CUT THE LABEL OFF. I've been writing rants about depression quite a bit lately - haven't printed any yet though - but obviously now it's the time to do it. I am totally comfortable with telling you that I have been 'triggered' into another one by the death of Charlotte Dawson.
Charlotte Dawson had a HUGE heart. And she was highly sensitive.
She did GREAT things for some people - lots of people, and she stuffed up sometimes too. She wasn't totally PC - could also be mean, bitchy etc - but only the perfect person is qualified to condemn another. She was real. No matter what she put on her skin, how much plastic surgery she may have had, she was as real as any other person. We are all real.
And she suffered. And man did she ever suffer being a bit of a tall poppy. Despite the fact that she often felt like a failure - she was an achiever.
Why have I posted a picture of a mountain instead of Charlotte? You'll find out below - and anyway - she is probably already all over the place in your newsfeed - so I don't have to.
She may have passed, very tragically today, but she has also given a gift. She has instantly become an even more poignant face than she already was for cyber bullying, media bullying and mental wellness.
People will debate, reminisce, reason and argue. People will say 'oh no, it was such a waste' but they weren't living her life, and they don't know how she felt. It was her journey to walk, and now she is finished. Some will scoff and others will hold compassion. But I think more will hold compassion.
She has held up a torch to darkness, to an underbelly we don't like to look at. This will be a change maker for many people - and in that way she gives even more meaning.
People who suffer often 'feel for others'. Sometimes too much.
I am not speaking on behalf of Charlotte, but I am aware that constantly pushing yourself, having to 'perform', self criticism, caring too much about what others think, the inclination to make the world a better place, to save/repair/fix people - all these things can make you extra absorbent to the stagnant, dirty or heavy energy that flies around looking for a resting place.
It is possible for some people to take on so much 'stuff' from other people that you don't know where they start and you end or vice versa - in the public eye, this is often a hazard.
No matter who you are, if you have had life trauma, hardship or arrived on the planet without your spiritual umbilical cord nice, bright, shiny and fully intact - you may be prone to being depressed.
If life has not gone the way you wanted it to - same goes.
If you repeatedly stare down the black dog, or feel like you are stuck down the hole, and you tell yourself that you are D-Pressed - you certainly have a 'situation'. But a situation is a space, a platform, a place, and you can move from there - even just inch by inch.
You can tell me it's a chemical imbalance - but I know it's energetic. Hyper sensitive people who continue to surround themselves with thoughts/things/food/people that crush the spirit - their wellness cannot help but be suppressed and that may well create/perpetuate or enhance a chemical imbalance.
It's likely you are not going to feel like sunshine and roses and be Mary Poppins.
Just like the chicken and the egg - the bottom of the hole, the black dog and the chemical imbalance or the shitty situations swirl around together. One creates the other and vice versa.
It doesn't matter which one comes first. It still feels horrible.
CUT THE LABEL OFF. Change your position/space/platform.
Some - not all of the media (the Press) have done an absolutely rip roaring ,STUNNING job of selling us depression. They have gone so far as to allow people to be attacked, indoctrinated, wooed even, (see drama tv etc) into believing that the world is full of terrible things/people and events. They print what works for them - I hope you don't think they all print the things that work for you. The moral compass is missing quite a lot of the time.
It can seem like the world is full of terrible things - but perspective - man it's a good thing to have.
The media has done an EPIC job of telling women there is a man shortage - that doesn't cheer any of them up - it's done an epic job of saying you have to have a 68 million dollar wedding - or have the smallest nose, biggest boobs, blondest hair, most measurable success. And you've got to be connected.
Call that thing COMPRESSION. It's suppression, oppression, repression, it's bullshit. Sometimes it's about identifying too much with pain, to too many people in pain, and just wanting to get your message across that the world has been bad to you. And that's ok for a while. Having a life crisis is your personal right. Many, many things are tough for us to deal with, but too often we just skip straight to the D word to identify our issues. That's like a certificate in misery.
Yep - if you've got that, people know how to 'get' you. And where you're coming from.
But if you were covered in bullshit (suppression, repression, oppression) - you would go and wash that off - right??
Change the game. YOU, not it - ARE the driver. You may need some training wheels to give you a hand, so here you are: CUT THE LABEL OFF.
Find your voice - EXPRESSION helps. If you must call it anything - call it COMPRESSION. This enables you to pick apart the crap and action your to-do for wellness list.
Do honour yourself and take a good hard look at what you concentrate on. If you open your mouth and complain regularly about life - do notice your words - these are your clues - and see what you can change about the situation.
By YOUR OWN WORDS you will either flourish or suffer.
DO NOT swallow the line that there is nothing you can do about it because it's bigger than you. It is not. This IS ANOTHER MYTH you have been fed. You may also believe that you have no choice - you may not turn into an instant Mary Poppins, and the world doesn't need a whole lot of them anyway, but something CAN improve. So changing that belief is your first step.
When I learned to ski - I was up the top of the Jungfrau in Switzerland. Please excuse my language, but that MOFO is 4000+ metres above sea level.
I looked down the mountain and almost peed my pants. My friend, who I was furious with for taking me so high when I 'knew' I couldn't ski, told me I only had to ski the one metre in front of me at any given time. And despite the fact that I was unbelievably mad with him, (and may have even wanted to belt him one) I knew it was true.
I did not know what I was doing, but I got down the mountain eventually using a learner technique called snowploughing. I hated it. I moaned, I bitched, I kicked up and carried on, (now that I think about it, I probably left a cloud of filthy energy there to be honest) but I got down the mountain. It seemed to take me Y E A R S. The first parts, of course were hardest. It was painful. Eventually it got easier. The following day I could ski a little bit, and the next day was better too.
(And one day later on - I could ski very well. I've wished many times to be back on that mountain.)
And in that way, bit by bit, just a few years ago, I also walked myself out of a horrible black hole too.
After years of life trauma and some horrific events. Although it obviously took longer, it was a similar kind of journey.
I never ever labelled myself and I think that was a crucial factor in my recovery. (Energy work would have been very useful - but I was a sceptic and never even imagined it was real. Go figure.)
Energy can be cleaned back to the source, and the source can be held to the light and gently loved back into balance.
You only have to ski the metre in front of you. And with someone helping you to snowplough, you can bitch, fight, moan, fuss and kick up a stink, or you can just let go and love it all the way out.
There is always help. Ask for that help if you need it. And be that help if someone else does. And know the journey is personal, and sometimes, no matter how much you want to give that help, some people cannot and will not accept it. Please be brave enough to be ok with that too. It takes a certain amount of courage to sit with another persons pain and allow it to simply be.
The world is filled with unbelievably amazing healers, YOU and I are two of them, (you may not know that about yourself yet) and all we are doing here, is helping to walk (or ski) each other home.
End of rant.
RIP Charlotte, thank you for your contribution to the planet. Peace at last. Go well.